Michael Todd Howard, 35, pleaded guilty in a court in San Diego Tuesday in return for an expected sentence of one year in jail and probation, prosecutors said.

According to court documents, last September, Howard broke into the home of a woman with whom he thought he had set up an encounter on what was described as a "rape fantasy" chat site. After he entered the wrong apartment, he hit and struggled with the 25-year-old woman inside, who told law enforcement officials she thought she was going to be killed.

The victim stopped the attack by yelling and attacking Howard's testicles. Howard then asked for the name the victim used in the chat room and she responded by saying she had never visited a chat room and did not have a personal computer.

As a part of the plea deal, prosecutors dropped charges of intent to commit rape, false imprisonment and possession of illegal drugs. Howard will be sentenced next month. 

Here's how it works. During the first visit, We Scoop Poop would like you to introduce to them your dog(s) and show us around the yard. (Obviously to see how much shit they're dealing with!) They actually will charge an additional $18 fee in addition to the normal charges to large amounts of shit.

Here's the price breakdown from their website:

Cost

• $9.00 per week for 1 dog and $3.00 for each additional dog.
• Additional $2.00 per week for scooping both the front and back yards.
• Twice per week service involves two separate trips (no shit!) so the price is double the once per week rate.

One-Time Scoops

Maybe you don't want weekly poop pickups. Maybe there is just one single time you're just too tired picking up after your dog. Or maybe your dog just had the runs one day and you didn't feel like scrubbing. No problem! We Scoop Poop clean your yard only once if necessary. Here are the prices for One-Time Scoops, which is based on the number of dogs in the yard.

• 1 dog = $30
• 2 dogs = $35
• 3 dogs = $45
• 4 dogs = $55
• 5 dogs = $65 etc.

(What if no dogs are in the yard, but just a mound of shit?)

CLICK HERE to visit We Scoop Poop now!

CHINESE BAN WALKING IN SEVERAL CITIES!
(From Weekly World News)

Chinese cities are so clogged with pedestrian traffic that authorities have banned walking, sauntering, shuffling, moseying and ambling in public -- and now say everybody must run.

The only people who don't have to comply with the law, which carries a stiff fine and possible jail time for repeat offenders, are senior citizens, who have been told it will be permissible for them "to walk as fast as they can" or "just jog" if they're too weak and debilitated to sprint when venturing into major metropolitan areas.

"The Chinese people will comply with the order because they understand how important it is for cities to operate smoothly," says Beijing Police Capt. Shigu Tang, noting that bicycles were banned from cities in 2003 to make room for cars.

"Before the law was enacted, pedestrian gridlock was an everyday occurrence in any city of size. That's where people are jammed together so tightly that nobody can move, sometimes for hours at a time.

"Something had to be done."

The law was handed down suddenly and with no advance notice on January 7 by China's Ministry of Public Safety.

Within hours, policemen and soldiers in riot gear were lobbing canisters of tear gas, firing rubber bullets and using advanced kung fu techniques to encourage pedestrians of all ages "to pick up the pace."

And even though people are still packed in cities, the pedestrian gridlocks that paralyzed streets just weeks ago are little more than a bad memory now.

"Now pedestrians are moving," says the police captain. "If they don't move, they get trampled and stomped.

"Western journalists and diplomats are highly critical. But that's because they're fatsos and in terrible shape. Running is a real problem for them unless they hear somebody clanging a dinner bell."

It's true that obesity isn't much of a problem in China because food is scarce. But fat doesn't account for the estimated 43,000 slow-moving senior citizens -- many of them hump-backed and with bad knees -- who have been injured or, in some cases, killed by fleet-footed children and younger adults who ran all over them to comply with the law.

"I pushed my own mother to the ground and stepped on her face," says Yong Huang, 38. "But the law is the law. I had no choice. The police were going to shoot me with their rubber bullets.

"I have a family to support. I did what I had to do. My mother forgives me, and now she stays home."

Human-rights groups are fuming over the running law that affects some 750 million people who live in large cities, but spokesmen admit there's probably little if anything they can do.

"There's no getting around the fact that China's cities are overpopulated and people are packed in like sardines," says one Washingtonbased activist. "If there's a better way to ease things up, I'm sure they're open to suggestions."